Rimming, anilingus or simply a rim job — all of those names describe the same thing, which to put it nicely means orally stimulating your partner’s anus. It may not sound too appealing, many would call it revolting but when done properly, it will give your partner an amazing orgasm.
Today’s sex guide will focus on how to do it in the right, safe way. Before you attempt it, make sure your partner’s downstairs is squeaky clean. A quick shower or even douching should do the trick. Most people also shave their arsehole.
Dangers of Rimming
All right, you both decided to try tossing the salad, cleaning is done, mood is set, but wait. What about STIs? Unfortunately, rimming can spread all sorts of bacteria and viruses, like herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhoea, HIV, syphilis, and human papillomavirus (HPV). Don’t worry, it sounds scary, but it’s basically the same as with regular oral fun or normal intercourse. If your partner or you aren’t sure about each other’s health, you can use a dental dam. It’s not a popular protection, but it’s very useful if you’re intimate with multiple partners. A dental dam is a thin sheet of latex (or polyurethane) that you place over a vagina or anus, depending on what are your plans for the evening. In case they’re not sold in your area, you can just cut off both ends of a condom, then cut it open and use it like this. Remember, a dental dam, makeshift, or store-bought, is one time use only.
How to Rim Your Partner
The techniques for rimming a man and a woman are not very different, and both will enjoy it the same. Let’s discuss the moves you can pull to make your lover see the stars!
- Lick, lick and more lick — this is great for beginners, but it also might make you tired quickly. Your tongue doesn’t have to be too flexible for that, all you have to do is move it up, down and in circles around your partner’s anus. You can also slide it inside from time to time.
- Kiss my ass — a good way to start a rimming session is to move your lips and tongue like you’re kissing someone on the lips. It might feel weird at first, but it’s guaranteed your lover will enjoy it.
- Get on the inside — if you mastered the first technique and your partner’s arsehole is already wet, you can push your tongue inside and move it in similar motion as during cunnilingus or deep kissing.
- Blow me — in case your mouth gets tired (and if you’re doing it correctly — it will), you can stop for a moment and just blow air on your partner’s wet hole. You can also spit a little.
- Use your hands — once it’s all nice and wet, you can try to finger your lover, but only if they agree to it before. Remember that arsehole doesn’t self-lubricate, so you have to be more careful if it gets too dry.
Positions to get Down and Dirty
Now, that you know what to do, let’s get more specific. It’s important that you’re both comfortable, so the next logical step is to explore your options for positions.
- Doggy style — the receiving person gets down on their hands and knees on the bed, they can partially lie on their chest. This position will be the best for them, but your neck might hurt after a while. On the other hand, it’s perfect if the rim job is only the foreplay for anal play.
- Forward bend — the receiving person stands up and leans forward (preferably enough to grab their ankles), with their legs bend as much as they need to. Then, you can kneel behind them, with a very easy access to deep rimming.
- Spread eagle — the easiest one yet, the receiving end lies down, open their legs and slightly raise them. In this position, you can stimulate their genitalia at the same time.
- 69 position — in most 69 positions you can give your partner a rim job, check out our 69 sex guide for inspiration.
Introduction to Anal
Many people choose to use rimming as a foreplay before anal intercourse or prostate stimulation. It’s a great option, but you have to remember that arsehole needs additional lube apart from your spit. It’s best to use a water-based lube, but check first if it’s edible and anal-friendly. Some brands of water lubes are not recommended to use with condoms, so be careful. Also, remember to stretch your partner’s anus, just because it’s wet enough doesn’t mean it’s prepared. Check out our beginner’s guide to Anal sex and our guide to prostate massage to discover more anal techniques and pleasures.
Summing up this sex guide, as great as anal play seems, it takes way more preparation than vaginal sex. Is it worth it? Decide for yourself.
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